Enpty nest book reviews.
OK, so I am not turning this blog into an "empty nest" blog, but I do intend on including more personal musing mixed in with the usual handwork thing. I think that doing that will make me a little more interested in posting more often, because frankly, it was getting a little boring trying to just stay on handwork related subjects all the time.
So, just wanted to say a few words about a few books that I have recently read regarding "empty nest syndrome", feeling that I needed some affirmation about what I was going through, and this is what I found: In general, these books did not make me feel better, but worse.
Beyond the Mommy Years, How to Live Happily Ever After...After the Kids Leave Home by Carin Rubenstein, Phd. Well, this one was full of well investigated situations of cross sections of women from all over and how they deal and cope with mid-life empty nest. The title is misleading, it is NOT a how to book. It left me feeling both hopeful and hopeless, and actually made me feel kind of anxious with statements like "the fifties are a last chance decade"...yeah, like I needed that. Read it if you want, it was pretty matter of fact. The chapter on sex was depressing as heck.
The Empty Nest, 31 parents tell the truth about relationships, love, and freedom ater the kids flly the coop edited by Karen Stabiner. Read this if you want to cry for days. I was feeling pretty good about things, then I picked this book up and had a crying breakdown that lasted for the entire book. It was torturous. So, if you need a good cry, which you probably are not a stranger of if your kid(s) just flew the coop, this is your book. I wish I never read it, it took me days to get back on a happy track! This is what I call a " misery loves company" kind of book.
133 Ways to Avoid Going Cuckoo When the Kids Fly the Nest by Lauren Schaffer and Sandy Fleischl Wasserman. This book is a quick quirky read. It is a humorous look at the ENS, and I think does the job quite well. Fun to read, good advice, nothing that will leave your heart in tatters on the floor. Great advice, some I took on, like NOT making knee jerk decisions the week after your kid is gone, like throwing all his stuff out (which I almost did), moving (which I thought about), quitting your job (gave that some thought), etc. Very pragmatic advice, I wish I had read it before so that I didn't fall into booby traps that would start the water works (like sitting in my son's room crying, shoulda closed that door for a while until I was ready for that one! That said, the fact that it was in this book made me feel a little less crazy, and for the record, I can easily go in and out of my son's room without a breakdown a month after his launch)
Anyway, that is about all the books I will read on this subject. Did they help? Not really, but the last one did a little bit and made me laugh when I didn't think I had a laugh left in me!
Well, I had one more read left in me evidently! Just finished Fun Without Dick and Jane, Your Guide to a Delightfully Empty Nest by Christie Mellor. This book is a possitive look at life after kids, and won't allow you to look at things in a negative light. Pretty uplifting overall, I would have tossed it if it started to get wallowy in misery...(she also wrote "The Three Martini Playdate" and "The Three Martini Family Vacation", so if you read those, you know what you are in for!
Well, I had one more read left in me evidently! Just finished Fun Without Dick and Jane, Your Guide to a Delightfully Empty Nest by Christie Mellor. This book is a possitive look at life after kids, and won't allow you to look at things in a negative light. Pretty uplifting overall, I would have tossed it if it started to get wallowy in misery...(she also wrote "The Three Martini Playdate" and "The Three Martini Family Vacation", so if you read those, you know what you are in for!
Now to finish up my handwork curriculum, I intend to have everything set and ordered by week's end. Next post will be all about that! Onwards and upwards !!
(oh, and the picture is my son in his 6th grade play as Merlin)
